One Week to Spring Training

I am not going to downplay the utter disapointment about what happened last weekend.  However, as is the case with any major travesty, I am trying to get through the various phases of the grief: shock and disbelief, anger, dispair.  Now, I am ready for the final stage: reoganization. 

Gentlemen, we are one week away from spring training.  Its time to buck up, baseball is almost here, and this guy pitches for us.

Sleep on this

Michael Strahan really knows how to prepare for a big game.  He says on the Saturday before Super Bowl 42, “if we go to bed like we’ve been going to bed, if we just go to bed like we’ve been doin, we’ll play good.” New England has been reeling from these comments.  Apparantly Robert Kraft and Bill Bellechek have been trying to figure out how they are going to go to bed. Kraft did mention, “money never sleeps. And since we’re not bitches like the giants, we don’t say stupid shit like Strahan does.”

Every Kiss Begins with Kraft

Kay, Jared, and Hanoush are all excellent jewelers.  Every year that New England wins a Championship, Robert Kraft charges each of these three jewelers to a contest.  The winner takes home the business.

There are three phases to the contest.  Shotgunning beers is the first phase and the first jeweler to crush 14 bud heavies wins. Then the jewelers have to play with a midget’s balls. The first jeweler to make a perfect erection wins.  Last the jewelers take diamonds and cut drawings into glass with their diamonds. Typically Kraft makes the jewlers draw something cool – past pictures have included a Continental soldier and a bayonette as well as a Porpoise.

Hanoush has won the contest once and Jared won twice.  Stay tuned to see what Jeweler won the rights to adorn this years perfect New England Patriots with their rings.

A Pep Talk from Mel

Fight and you may die.  Leave and you may live…for a while.  And many years from now, while lying in your death beds, would you trade this moment for one chance to tell our enemies, you can take our wives.  You can plow them while I watch.  I can play with myself a little bit.  And you can defile them repeatedly, but you can never take our freedom.

A Poor, Pitiful Loser

Well done, Specter, you douche-bag.  Maybe you, A-Rod and Boras should all get together and figure out other ways to try and get some attention in the media in the most distasteful, self-promoting way.  Can you please just appreciate New England sports dominance and stop your bitching?

http://www.ogpaper.com/news/news-01654.html

Respectable SB Picks

    

 What do Barry Williams, Omar Epps, Karch Kiraly, Adam West, Bob Weir, Jack Nicklaus, Carl Weathers, and Elisabeth Shue have in common?

They’re all picking the Pats in the Super Bowl, THAT’S WHAT!

I think Carl Weathers said it best: “It’s impossible not to go with New England. Congratulations to New York, but they won’t win this Super Bowl.”

Just to recap — when The Golden Bear, Bob Weir, Ali with an I, Willie Mays Hayes, Batman, Greg Brady, Apollo Creed, and Mr. Volleyball all pick the Pats to win, I think it’s safe to say the Pats will win.

Among those who are picking the Giants: Bill O’Reilly, Dolph Lundgren, Pat Robertson, Mark Cuban and Serena Williams. ‘Nuff said…

 *Source: Scripps Howard News Service

Preparation